{"id":5149,"date":"2021-12-04T17:24:57","date_gmt":"2021-12-04T17:24:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/expatkaliningrad.com\/?p=5149"},"modified":"2022-01-02T11:54:44","modified_gmt":"2022-01-02T09:54:44","slug":"please-look-a-weird-ufo-off-the-baltic-coast","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/expatkaliningrad.com\/ru\/please-look-a-weird-ufo-off-the-baltic-coast\/","title":{"rendered":"Please Look! A Weird UFO off the Baltic Coast!"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/div>\n

What is it?!<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Published: 4 December 2021 ~ Please Look! A Weird UFO off the Baltic Coast!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Olga took this photograph last week on a very cold and snowy night on the Baltic Coast. \u201cWhat is it?\u201d we asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt\u2019s your wife!\u201d my brother replied.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI know,\u201d I said, \u201cbut who\u2019s that next to her, to the right of the photograph, on the right-hand side as you are looking at it?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It could have been the Imp of the Flippant, but then again? Small settlements along the Baltic Coast are rich in folklore and teeming with legends about ghosts, ghouls and unexplained phenomenon, so believing everything that we read in the press, we put it to the test: we asked for second opinions from people in the UK on what the green-faced, bog-eyed monster might be.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOi, that\u2019s no way to talk about your husband!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

To protect the not-so, never-were or never-could-be innocent, we have omitted the names of the respondents and replaced them with a brief description of ‘type’ in italicised text after each quote.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Responses to the question: What is it in the photograph?<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhatever it is, it\u2019s a different colour so you should be taking a knee\u201d ~ a hairy-fairy quite contrary <\/em>Wokist<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt looks to me as if it is an extra-large Covid particle specifically designed to lend some sense to the argument that wearing face masks can stop coronavirus\u201d ~ a man with a three-week old face mask hanging below his chin<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI thought, ‘I\u2019ve seen one of these before’. In fact, I had the distinct impression that I had seen thousands of them. And then it clicked! It was the rabid, barking, frothing, foaming at the mouth, hyperventilating pro-vaccination poltergeist, screaming get vaccinated now in order to save yourselves and the rest of society! If you don\u2019t, I\u2019ll murder yu!\u201d ~  a man who has since received Facebook<\/em> of the Year Award 2021<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI think you\u2019re right! The last time I saw one of these they were carrying a placard with \u2018Stop Brexit\u2019 written across it!\u201d ~ Mr Wagtale<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cLeave it out! You know it\u2019s me muvver in law!\u201d ~ the last cockney geezer in London to know about white flight<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThe green face symbolises the paranoid fringe to which vaccine-hesitant conspiracy theorists are driven via a self-inflicted disconnect from sane members of a beneficent social spectrum from which their psychosis has ostracised them due to a process which they are reluctant to confess is nobody else\u2019s fault but the consequence of their own choice and actions and that blah, blah, blah, drone, drone, drone\u201d ~ a pseudo-psychological nasty Nazi narcissist from the UK<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWell, I\u2019ll be buggered, if it\u2019s not George Sorryarse!\u201d ~ A George Sorryarse spotter<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWell, I\u2019ll be buggered, if it\u2019s not George Sorryarse!\u201d ~ George Sorryarse\u2019s\u2019 Reflection<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWell, I\u2019ll be buggered\u201d ~ someone (everyone) who believes that George Sorryarse is what western media says he is<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt\u2019s such a bloody mess, it has to be the UK establishment\u2019s plan to protect everyone from coronavirus\u201d ~ the man who drew up the plan<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cA pair of old fisherman\u2019s underpants time travelling across the Curonian Lagoon\u201d ~ a likely story<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt\u2019s sexist! It\u2019s racist! It\u2019s an offence to gender neutrals! It\u2019s Brexit! It\u2019s a symbol of British Imperialism! It should be taking a knee! It\u2019s homophobic! It\u2019s anti-candle-lit vigil! It\u2019s in violation of everything that Facebook cons us with! It\u2019s inciting revisionist hatred! It\u2019s inciting cancel-culture hatred! It\u2019s everything I accuse others of, but which stares at me from my mirror! It\u2019s liberal!\u201d ~ a liberal<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt\u2019s a red thing in a rectangle\u201d ~ a recently graduated millennial-era student with a triple \u2018A\u2019 mark in all 45 subjects taken (which he did in a week, although his first language was Martian)<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI think its \u2026 \u201c {You have just been redirected to an article that tells you the truth about vaccination<\/em>}<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt\u2019s a vaccination passport with an inferiority complex who believes she has no friends\u201d ~ the Dwarf from the North<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThe last time I saw one of those I was working for The Guardian<\/em>\u201d~ an \u2018it\u2019 that is glad that \u2018it\u2019 no longer does<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s Green but got a satanic face?\u201d ~ a Green Party MP<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cGreenpeace 30 years on\u201d ~ a pointless exercise<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou\u2019ll never know the truth\u201d ~ the UK media<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt could be a trick of the light?\u201d ~ a world-leading virologist deplatformed for not towing the establishment line<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt\u2019s the latest strain known as Sinoucret\u201d ~ a WHO public health specialist with a developed sense of anagramism<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWHO?\u201d ~ most likely<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWHAT FOR?\u201d ~ don\u2019t ask!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWHERE?\u201d ~ everywhere<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWHEN?\u201d ~ never!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cAre you quite finished?\u201d ~ No! Davos<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

[Answers supplied by an anonymous cohort of public health specialists and Big Pharma scientists handpicked by Establishment inc]<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Light reading:<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\ude01UK Lockdown Board Game<\/a>
\ud83d\ude02Exit Strategy ~ a new bored game<\/a>
\ud83e\udd23Clueless! World Health Game<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Copyright \u00a9 2018-2022 Mick Hart. All rights reserved.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

What is it?! Published: 4 December 2021 ~ Please Look! A Weird UFO off the Baltic Coast! Olga took this photograph last week on a very cold and snowy night on the Baltic Coast. \u201cWhat is it?\u201d we asked. \u201cIt\u2019s your wife!\u201d my brother replied. \u201cI know,\u201d I said, \u201cbut who\u2019s that next to her, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5155,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_themeisle_gutenberg_block_has_review":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[69],"tags":[1711,290,262,295,224,292,531,1667,1712,1710,436],"class_list":["post-5149","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-meanwhile-in-the-uk","tag-a-weird-ufo-off-the-baltic-coast","tag-coronavirus-babble","tag-coronavirus-conspiracy-theories","tag-coronavirus-masks","tag-coronavirus-uk-lockdown","tag-coronavirus-who","tag-covid-19-vaccine-race","tag-covid-restrictions","tag-expatkaliningrad-com","tag-please-look-a-weird-ufo-off-the-baltic-coast","tag-will-life-change-after-covid-19"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t